Category Archives: Blog

The Three Mental Tools That Help with Letting Things Go

When it comes to downsizing to move or downsizing to live comfortably in your present home, it can be tough to make decisions about what to keep and what to let go. Some people become accidental hoarders just from bringing things home from Senior Expos, all those goodie bags full of samples and helpful information. When it is time to make decisions about getting rid of stuff the brain fog creeps in.

Here are three mental toughness tools to use to strengthen your resolve.

  1. Your commitment scale
  2. Your mantra “no shame – no blame”
  3. Your new ability to think like a ghost

Here’s how it works…you come across an item you know you should get rid of, let’s say an aged unfinished craft project. The commitment scale is adopted from the pain scale you see in doctors’ offices. On a scale of 1 to 10 how committed are you to finishing this project? Let’s say its been in a closet for several years. If you think it is a “10” then you are very committed to finishing it and will start immediately. If it is a “1” then you’ll have no problem sending it on its way. It’s that gray area between 1 and 10 where the decision making is difficult.

 Perhaps the knowledge of how much you paid for it creates guilt for you at the thought of letting it go. This is where repeating “no shame- no blame” can lessen the trauma.  Even if it was very expensive, that money has already been spent. It doesn’t put the money back into your pocket to hang on to it. You are a different person now than you were then and your interests have changed.

If this isn’t enough, then imagine yourself to be a ghostly observer as your belongings are sorted and removed by family members or hired clean-out specialists. How will they view this item? What will they do with it? At this time the decision is yours. Deal with it.

What is an “Aging Coach”?

These days I am long past any interest in being “youthful”. I am what I am and what you see is what you get. Instead, my concerns are about managing my energy and my short-term memory. I am also concerned about my ability to continue to live in my own house as I age and what to do when that is no longer possible. When my friends and I get together I find we have the same concerns. So, I offer myself as an aging coach and a coach who is aging.

The Yellow Pie Plate Manifesto

Who Gets Grandma's Yellow Pie Plate? textbook

The best book for family discussions about what needs to be done when handing on personal possessions.

This is for all the “Grandmas” out there who want to be in charge of what happens to their ‘stuff’. You need to be strong in order to wade into the rooms full of accumulations.
Manifesto # 1 – You need to be going through your stuff.
Manifesto # 2 – Sorting is therapy.
Manifesto # 3 – Everything has a story to tell.
Manifesto # 4 – Be kind to yourself… ” No shame – no blame”
Manifesto # 5 – Some people will be unhappy.
Manifesto # 6 – “Fairness” varies.
Manifesto # 7 – It’s Yours, not theirs.